Ping Piang Gio

9:57 pm Saturday, June 12, 2010

Itching.

I was watching an HK drama last night when it showed a scene of employees having a meeting. Suddenly, i felt a pang of... i don't know... missing work?

I missed the times when my HPB colleagues and I would attend meetings with our mugs and sweaters, and the kind of 交流 and exchange of ideas. Even though often so much time is wasted ;)

I miss corporate life, dressing up and going to work, sitting in my cubicle and getting tangible work done. I guess mainly w.r.t. my job in HPB. Strange, that I still envision myself going back to work there, if not, some other government agency.

Not that I resent now being a SAHM (stay-at-home-mum) . It's a different kind of fulfillment. I enjoy playing with Boyboy and just watching him learn and grow. But time just passes too fast.

I wake in the morning and am busy with him all the way til Hubby comes home in the evening. Sometimes my Mum comes over with lunch and plays with him and I get a break. Else none.

I'm apprehensive, especially now that Boyboy has entered the 'almost crawling/standing' phase and is super excitable. He now naps for only 30 minutes every 2-3 hours, which is barely enough for me to eat my meals, take a loo break and drink water.

And that is after I spend up to 45 mins rocking him to sleep. Was resistent to the idea of rocking, but now it seems that he is so hyper that he won't sleep otherwise. Once I left him to fall asleep by himself as usual, and he was still up 1 hr later, flipping around in bed and peering through his cot bars.

That is set to get worse once he can actually move around by himself. But i guess like every other mum, I will (must) learn to cope with it. I just hope that doesn't coincide with Hubby's upcoming reservist when he has to stay overnight in camp for days.

Each day just passes in a flash, and I only have time for myself at night, after he falls asleep at 8pm, and I have my dinner by 9pm. Which is now. Then I have to sleep by 11pm cos Boyboy still wakes multiple times in the middle of the night, either for water or cos his pacifier dropped out.

Which means only 2 hrs to get back some semblance of my life. (How to lose weight with such eat-and-sleep routine!)

Difficult to get many things I want to do, done, such as tidying up the messy house, cos I am so tired sometimes I'ld rather just watch TV and stone, or surf and catch up with friends on FB. Have to remember to give Hubby some attention too.

Like many SAHMs do, I also feel my braincells dying due to lack of use. Being a Mummy needs terrific skills, but a different skills set from being in the workforce. I would still want to go back to work if possible, but am trapped in a dilemma as I don't want to miss out on Boyboy's growing years. No maid for me pls, thank you.

Been hoping that my Mum can take care of Boyboy some days, so I can at least get a part-time job. But sis' hyper mongrel is still under my Mum's care, and we are all afraid of what its pouncing can do to a baby. Strange that the dog is taking priority over Boyboy (and me). Maybe I have not been insistent enough.

Had planned to earn some income by doing freelance copywriting and design, but am now finding it not worth the opportunity cost. Staying up to work on projects is killing me, cos I need the sleep and presence of mind in order to take good care of Boyboy instead of yelling at him when I'm concussed.

Not to mention having to deal with pain in the a** clients who make me work for peanuts and insist on useless meetings that take me away from time with Boyboy. Not worth it :(

So, feeling in a bit of limbo now. Stuck, or rather, suspended, pending further changes. SIGH.

Labels: Concrete Jungle, Homebody, I'm A Mummy

11:57 am Monday, May 25, 2009

Handwashing campaign

When I read in the newspapers that Health Promotion Board has launched a new handwashing song for kids, for a moment I was pissed. I had written a little ditty (previous post) for the same purpose while I was working there, and the visuals flashed on TV news showed the poster I did. So had my song been hijacked for their latest campaign?

Luckily, it's a new one.

But I still attribute the concept to me, cos I had proposed a song as a reinforcement, especially for little children. My bosses never did pick up the idea, until now.

I was thinking, why was I feeling offended? Even if they had indeed hijacked my work, it was work done for the organisation as an employee, so I had no 'rightful claim' to it. Intellectual copyright is a difficult issue. Though personally I feel that as the creator, I still have the most rights to the work.

Feel bad for the design agency who did the poster for me then... their work has now been cut up and re-arranged to be used in this new song video. Isn't that an infringement of their copyright then? Although as with most working relationships in Singapore, the client is always right and always has the last say in what they do with whatever they pay you for. Especially when the client is the Gahmen.

Labels: Concrete Jungle, Cynic In The House, Designing My Future

9:02 pm Saturday, February 28, 2009

My teaching stint.

I don't know where to start.

After three tries attempting to become a Pri school teacher, I finally got offered Art, albeit at Secondary level. Because it was Art, I gave it a try, although I was very, very apprehensive about working with teens. Turns out my gut feeling was right.

I was given the whole Sec 1 level to teach Art, as well as a Sec 2 Express class for English.

Standard procedure was to put me on observation of other teachers for at least a week, but I was unlucky. I was thrown in and expected to teach on my first day, without any chance to learn from other teachers.

At 8 periods a week, I had to teach almost 5 hours of English in which I am totally untrained in. Every time I entered the classroom, I felt as if I was a fraud, just trying to make time pass as quickly as possible. After the 1st week, the thought of quitting entered my mind.

When I consulted my English HOD about my worries, she actually told me not to think so much and just read from the textbook and cover the syllabus. Which is so wrong, it shocked me.

----------------

I tendered my resignation after 2 weeks. The principal offered me a bargain --- he would take away my English class and make me a Pure Art teacher. So I withdrew my letter from MOE.

But he didn't deliver his side of the bargain. Instead, my English burden shifted from the Sec 2 Express class to a Sec 1 Normal Academic class. According to my HOD, this was a class that the school does not have expectations for, so it didn't matter if I couldn't deliver. The switch was supposedly meant to 'relieve my stress'.

Class 1H was horrible. Two-third of the class consist of boys, who cannot sit still during any of their classes. They would be walking around, chatting or throwing pens at one another. I spent every lesson shouting and screaming at them, threatening detention --- to which they will reply "Detention, detention lor!"

I was also placed as co-form teacher of the Sec 1 Normal Technical class, which was worse than 1H in that they would be chasing, fighting and running in and out of class during lessons. Attempts to control them only invited their laughs. No such thing as teaching during their lessons.

So basically, I felt like an inept teacher for the past 2 months. I was not teaching, but shouting every day. I asked colleagues for advice, but most who handled the same classes confessed they had given up on the students.

Hence I tendered my resignation again after 2 more weeks i.e. after 1 month. I was pissed when MOE issued a letter telling me that "resignation should be taken seriously". As if I didn't! It was the principal who did not keep his word.

----------------

The discipline in the school also greatly disappointed me. Being a cheena school associated with a clan association, I expected it to have strong values and a strict hand. Apparently the current principal does not think discipline is that important.

(1) Students don't even open their mouths to sing the National Anthem and say the Pledge every morning. And all he does is stand on the stage and implore, "Sec 1s, please sing louder."

(2) He came into 1H as he could hear them from the General Office (yes they are that rowdy). I was so happy to see him with the cane, thinking he was finally going to tekan them. Instead, he gave a soft, long-winded story on the cane's history and told them to please keep their volume down. WTH?!!

(3) A colleague complained to me that he dragged a pair of Sec 4 defiant boys to the office for caning. But his concern was dismissed in front of the boys and they were sent free.

I had also personally experienced the scum of the school. During one of my Sec 1 art classes, three Sec 3 gangsters were loitering outside the class, waiting to catch the tiny class monitor for 'a little chat'. Turns out he had reported their girlfriends in the class for handphone usage, and they were there for revenge.

I had to catch a passing male teacher to talk to them, gangster-to-gangster. The girls were so angry they tore up their artworks in my face. I managed to keep my cool and tell them no work = no marks. For the week after that, my husband fetched me from school, just in case.

On my last day of school, I also had to rush into the girl's toilet to handle a girl who had slashed her classmate with a scissors and locked herself in the cubicle.

Sigh. I applied to be a teacher, not a prison warden :(((

----------------

Most of my colleagues, on finding out that I was leaving, expressed their envy. They were tied up in their bond and had no choice. Many said that they would never have signed the bond if they had the chance to take a trial contract like me. They were counting down to the end of the bond so they could escape. Isn't that so sad?

There is a high price to pay for the high salary dished out by MOE.

Teaching sucks the life out of you, both mentally and physically. Our mistake is to imagine 'teaching' using our own experiences as a student --- students nowadays are different. Many do not have the right attitude; they don't even want to learn. There are such cases even in the best classes. How to teach like that?

I would rather just teach only those who really want to learn. Still pondering my options.

Labels: Concrete Jungle, Designing My Future

5:38 pm Thursday, September 11, 2008

Just like some of my clients

Labels: Concrete Jungle

3:19 pm Sunday, July 20, 2008

And that's the way the cookie crumbles!

I was wondering. Why are some people just so irritating? And the worst thing is that they are not even aware that they are being irritating. Or maybe they're just thick-skinned and acting blur. My fellow ceramic instructors pale in contrast to one of my husband's colleagues. My husband calls him Famous Anus, for he's a notorious a**hole.

The two of them went into the school together, and Famous Anus was so gian to raise his profile that he went around 'enthusiastically' making suggestions and promises which turned out to be empty as he failed to carry them through. He sucks up to superiors such as the principal and HODs, and goes around tapping people on their shoulders and calling them 'yo buddy' and bombarding them with sms-es of 'breaking news' that everyone already knew.

So now 2 years down the road, Famous Anus is hated by his fellow colleagues and not looked upon favourably by management who sees him as an empty vessel. Burning his bridges has not stopped him from trying though. He consistently maintains his annoying quotient.

My husband was very very annoyed when Famous Anus so irritated his supervisor that the latter kicked him out from her CCA group and pulled my husband in instead. This was not good, cos it meant my husband kena that CCA he was not interested in, and Famous Anus took over my husband's original CCA.

Famous Anus continues to 'accidentally' drop comments to my husband on how exciting his 'new' CCA is, and still has the gall to ask him what CCA he is doing now!

This past week my husband got pissed off cos Famous Anus was so keen to score points with students that he circulated my husband's private HP number for one of them to contact him. The student's rude guardian called up to ask stupid questions and refused to hang up.

I was telling my husband, if I were him, I'll go to random public toilets and leave Famous Anus' HP number behind the doors.

Labels: Concrete Jungle

3:56 pm Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Zoooop!!

5 minutes ago a colleague (picture a plump, jolly-looking uncle) from the other floor came to see us. He collates procurement documents from the system and passes it to us.

Coming by my cubicle, he said he heard that I am leaving, and asked why. With a cheeky grin I asked him to guess why. The colleague sitting opposite me excitedly raised her arms and said "Me too! Me too!"

Uncle went "Huh???!!"
Then shook his head.

He passed a stack of documents to a newbie colleague and started to leave. Newbie looked at the documents and exclaimed that it's not her name.

"Hey! I'm not Evelyn!"

"Huh? Then where is she?"

"Quit already."

"HUH??!!!"

Hahahaa... joke of the day. Says a lot doesn't it, of the staff turnover here.

Labels: Concrete Jungle

2:37 pm Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Gone with the wind

The colleague who told boss about my leaving was crying this morning (someone saw and told me). She must have been upset about the distance with the rest of us. That gave me mixed feelings.

I don't hate her, and I don't blame her anymore for telling. I don't want to continue holding a grudge because it makes both of us feel bad. In fact, I think I should give her the benefit of the doubt and believe that she had good intentions for telling. What have I got to lose? So if the intention is good, the action should be forgiven even if it's not right.

So there. I'm not angry anymore. Actually, I don't even need to be on my guard against her, as I'm leaving and don't have to worry about any information reaching boss, because there simply is nothing sensitive I can't share.

But I think she shouldn't need to worry about me now. Her problem is trying to convince our other colleagues that she can be counted on. The little bird who warned me didn't name her directly; I myself didn't finger her as the culprit when I blogged about the incident. But why did everyone, me included, immediately guess it was her?

I feel she succumbs to boss' mind-games, and hence is made to share certain things, thinking that it would help. So who's ultimately to blame? Boss.

There. Problem solved! Shall we point our fingers at the correct person then?

"You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well."

- Lewis B. Smedes

Labels: Concrete Jungle

8:51 am

The legendary Gahmen bonus

"SINGAPORE'S largest employer - the Government - will give its 60,000 civil servants a year-end bonus of two months (including the 13th month bonus). Add on the half-month bonus they received in July and the total bonus civil servants will get this year amounts to 2.5 months.

In addition, eligible civil servants will be paid a new performance-based Growth Bonus next March. Good performers will receive 0.5 month of Growth Bonus, and better performers will receive more - up to 0.8 month. With the Growth Bonus, the total payments for a good performer will be 3 months + S$220 for 2007, compared to 2.7 months + S$220 in 2006."

Flawed calculation. 2006 bonus was given at one go so the same person gets everything. This try-too-hard-to-be-clever 2007 system assumes that it is the same staff working from July til now.

If this happened last year, I would be super pissed. E.g. coming in September, working my butt off, and getting only 2 months because some invisible doppleganger received my half-month + $220 in July. It's one thing to penalise staff for not being loyal (or being bad-planners, if you look at it another way) if they don't stay until bonus time. It's another to penalise staff for coming into the organisation late! As if that can be helped.

Watch me make your money disappear!

For real, come March, I don't even know if HR will pro-rate my Growth Bonus given that I've left, even though it's supposed to be for 2007 and hello, I've been here the entire year. According to ex-staff, no breakdown will be given when they compute leftover pay and bonus. So you'll never know if they short-change you, nor will you have any evidence to confront them with. "Hey, be grateful that we're even giving you the money, so shut up and just take it."

I got a great grade for my performance, but I'm skeptical that it won't be moderated at senior management level considering that I'm leaving (for the 2nd time). Already someone high has warned me that I'll probably be blacklisted by the organisation. Ah well. What needs to be done needs to be done.

So, all in all... #%$%&*

Labels: Concrete Jungle, Cynic In The House

5:38 pm Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Black, white or grey?

Am I a kvetch? Am I so caught up in wallowing in self-pity that I don't notice the positive things in my job?

Two things happened today to make me self-reflect.

This morning the colleague who informed boss about my plans to quit came to speak with me. She had noticed everyone becoming distant from her, and finally realised that something had gone wrong. I understand why she feels upset to be ostracized. But somehow I couldn't bring myself to say anything after she offered her explanation. She said she divulged it in an attempt to help me, and that my opinion of her matters a lot to her, even if the rest think wrongly of her.

I don't know whether to believe her or not. Trust is a fragile thing. Once broken, it's difficult to mend.

It didn't really matter whether boss knew, for it was a fact and I wasn't afraid of letting her know, since I dared to blog about it. The only thing is that maybe she was prepared and hence is not in shock or trying harder to retain me. Which sort of makes me go "wah lau eh, no kick" at dropping the bombshell.

On hindsight, it doesn't matter what her intentions were. The fact is that she tells boss stuff. No matter how great your intentions, that still makes you a dangerous colleague to lunch with, cos we constantly have to be on our guard in case we leak any sensitive information.

So I don't know how her situation is going to be resolved.

The 2nd incident is that boss returned from her overseas trip (prematurely, damn!) with a present for me. An intricately designed cup to thank me for organising our staff retreat. Guilt trip alert!!!

She again talked to me about the possibility of staying on (again not offering any incentives), reiterated her good intentions for all her actions, and emphasised how much she loves our department and staff. All the time I was watching her mouth moving, I was telling myself to be skeptical and not be taken in by her brainwashing.

But somehow I wonder, what if she is being truthful? Then am i wrong to leave just like that, giving her no chance to 'wash away' the wrong accusations?

Then I catch and remind myself that it doesn't matter. At this stage I am just concerned about my well-being and the dreams I want to pursue. So I have to leave, even if I need to make her the bad guy. If I soften, I may end up staying in this comfort zone and not moving forward at all.

What a big, mixed ball of emotions.

Labels: Concrete Jungle

8:26 am Thursday, November 22, 2007

Checkmate

Spoke to HR for my 'informal' exit interview yesterday. Apparently my boss had called them up from overseas leave and asked them to speak to me about money matters. Nope, still no offer of pay rise to make me stay. Just the usual annual increments and 'bonus' for having a good appraisal. I have to admit, momentarily the prospect of a higher pay next year appealed to me.

Then I retched inside. You mean this is all that you can offer to make me stay? The annual increment is a given. No extra money bait? Not that it actually matters (but it sure would be nice to see how much you really want me; words alone are of no use). No amount of money can make me stay if the root of the problem is still there.

I'm repulsed by how no attempt was made to find out and try to resolve the cause of our unhappiness. Perhaps HR knew it was a systematic problem too big for them to control. But isn't that what HR is there for?

All in all, very disappointing 'chat'. Realised maybe my boss didn't really think I'll go; she thought that this money talk was what I wanted and it'll change my mind. Again, very disappointed that she can't see further than that.

She even tried using my colleagues' potential workloads as an excuse to guilt me into staying. Which is despicable, as I'd given her ample warning to hire a replacement. Well I guess then this is goodbye.

Endnote:
A colleague mentioned that they viewed a prospective hire's blog and decided against her as she ranted about her previous employer. So where does that leave me? Somehow I don't really care. I am not being slanderous; I am telling the truth for what it is.

If my future employer is aboveboard, I don't see why he or she needs to be afraid. Afterall the future is IT; there's no way one can control people from speaking their minds or passing word of mouth. Progress should encourage democracy, not silence us.

Labels: Concrete Jungle, Cynic In The House

8:53 am Thursday, November 15, 2007

Bliss is...

Eating breakfast beehoon with one crispy fried chicken wing and drinking soyabean milk, while reading the papers. At my desk when boss is far away. Aaaah~

Such indulgence brings me back to primary school days, when we can just pig out on sinful food in the canteen without worrying about fat content and calories ;)

And having that feeling of being free.

Labels: Concrete Jungle, Nostalgic Nut

10:51 am Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Generation gap

Just cleared last Sat's newspapers and found an article in Recruit, on how employees have changed by generations. It wrote that most senior management belong to the "baby boomers".

Baby boomers

See work as a reflection of their personal success
Believe in office hierarchy
Expect long hours and 'paying your dues' before u get what u want

"Gen Y" on the other hand, are the bulk of the new employees.

Generation Y

Value time over money and status i.e. work-life balance is key.
Believe that career is not everything
Value entrepreneurship, free agency and diversity more than loyalty
See self as equals and look for friendly employers
Employer must show commitment to fun, society and the environment too.

Seeing that the bosses in my workplace belong to the 1st group, and us staff to the 2nd group, it's no wonder staff turnover is so high. I like these paragraphs:

"With such different values and work styles, a flexible management style is needed.

The truth is, if managed properly, Gen Ys do clock longer hours, just not within the constraints of an 8-to-6 schedule. They demand a work-life balance and if it doesn't happen, they quit. (hooray!) On average, they change jobs every 18 mths to 3 yrs.

Some successful strategies to recruiting and retaining talent across the age groups is to create a collaborative work environment, accommodate work to lifestyles and open up dialogue channels to keep the discussion going."

What the article says is actually very much common sense that we already know. But when printed in words, it somehow validates how I feel and why I am quitting.

Also makes me ponder if it's my boss' upbringing that made her so inflexible i.e. not her fault, or whether she's just a bad manager.

Labels: Concrete Jungle

8:43 am

Oh happy day

I am SOOOOOO happy today. In fact, it started gnawing its way out last evening, as I took the train home. For the first time in a long while, I actually felt super relaxed after dinner.

This morning, I awoke to the chirping of birds and the cool morning breeze. I eagerly got ready for work, planning in my head which pieces of work to complete today. Even when it poured, there was a spring in my steps as I slooshed through the puddles.

You might wonder what's the reason for my elation....

Boss went on leave!!! Only back at end of the month (but I'm trying not to think of that dreadful day).

The atmosphere in the office was so different this morning. People were actually smiling and alive, voicing aloud their surprise that they had even looked forward to coming to work. We felt that we can finally breathe after being suffocated for so long.

I think it's very 失败 as a boss, when your staff are so tortured.

Labels: Concrete Jungle

1:23 pm Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Letting go

I'm blogging so much about work today, guess cos I need to unload (or upload haha) my resentments so I can let go. Hubby is complaining again that I'm letting work get to me, and that the negative vibes permeates our daily life. Just listening to my complaints at the end of the day makes him feel stressed as well. So here goes...gripe, gripe, gripe...then ahhhhhhhhhhhh~~ let go.

My appraisal yesterday went surprisingly well, and I got a B or "Very Good" grading, which is kind of above average. But somehow I am skeptical that it is based on my performance. Although I fully believe that I deserve it for my hard work, my boss is not one to be easily satisfied. No one is ever good enough for her, and every little mistake wipes out your previous achievements.

She most probably gave me a good grade to placate me and psycho me to renew my contract. It was also a bit hair-standing, the number of times she touched me on my arm during our meetings yesterday. Ah, all in the name of 'appreciating the staff'.

Well, it's too late. As a colleague reminded me, don't be taken in by her too-intentional gestures. I wouldn't, as some of the things she said to persuade me to stay drove me the other way instead.

I negotiated for a higher pay. Without even bothering to discuss with HR, she said that she doesn't think it'll happen, and 'anyway', there will be a pay adjustment for all ministries next year. Hey, she only got $750 in her first job. BTW, how much am I getting now, $1,700? OKAAAAAY. (That's like almost $1K less; so obviously she has no sense of her staff's market worth).

Then she said that money is not important. Hell, it isn't even important to get promoted. Just as long as we enjoy our work. Well, sorry, I don't. Not anymore. And hello, it IS so important to earn what you deserve, and go where you want to go. Then she told me that it's important to strike a balance between money, and our family life and mental well-being. ??!!! Hello, here we have none of the 3, that's precisely why everyone wants to leave. Seriously delusional.

I suspect she has become complacent because of her new hires recently --- two very steady workers. But hey, you're losing two very good people as well (yes, another colleague is also not renewing her contract). It disappoints me that she feels we are so easily replaceable.

But I tell myself not to bother, for why let my emotions be affected by this person whom I want to wipe out from my life? I just feel very sad that our very close group of colleagues are forced to spilt up because of this bad manager. We can achieve so much, and create such a dynamic department, if we hang on together :(

Labels: Concrete Jungle

9:46 am

Appraisal season

Had my appraisal yesterday. I feel that the system is fundamentally flawed, as a good worker may not necessary be liked by the boss. The appraisal system simply creates an opportunity for bosses to take revenge on their staff for not being 'obedient'. Did not happen to me, but my colleagues kena-ed.

All of us have a big point of contention. The appraisal system for my department is slightly different from that of the others in our organisation. Marcoms being a support division, we are supposed to serve the other divisions. Yes, serve. But upper management seem to be unable to differentiate that from being 'servile'.

We serve the divisions by liasing with media contacts and advising on publicity strategies. Doesn't that mean that we are the experts and sometimes will have to disagree with them for their own good?

But no. Part of our appraisal depends on the marks (literally) given to us by those we serve. Of course, this means that if they are opinionated and insist on marcom things that are not correct, we argue with them. Whoosh! See our marks dive.

Our internal clients fill in a feedback form after every project we do with them. The form is ranked 1-5, 1 being Dissatisfied and 5 being Very Satisfied. So 3 is Average. Pray tell, wouldn't any normal person put a 3 then, if she is neutral about your performance. But surprise surprise, we need to get a 4 to pass, which is almost impossible to get.

Another gripe is that we need to do external surveys to make sure our target audience gets the messages. No logistical support, no carefully-crafted questionaire. We're simply asked to stalk members of the public innocently wandering around our building, and 'force' them to give comments on our BTLs. Of course then the answers will be frivolous and inaccurate, especially if your BTL is a cheem wordy manual for professionals or doctors.

Shocker: turns out the internal and external feedback constitutes 40% of our appraisal. That means our entire year of hard work (73 projects for me, exceeding the prescribed 50 by almost 50%!) only accounts for half of our grading. I find that totally ridiculous.

How is such a system fair? And boss still chided me for burning out halfway through the year. Sigh.

Labels: Concrete Jungle

5:01 pm Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Quotable quotes

Want to know if I'm renewing? First tell me if you're raising my salary. Not for anything, but I have to be practical, you know what I mean? I'm just wondering... does the organisation appreciates its staff? Come on, take it as a challenge! It's your attitude that's the most important. Everywhere you go, it's going to be unfair.

So shouldn't I choose a job where I at least enjoy the work?

Labels: Concrete Jungle

10:59 pm Tuesday, October 30, 2007

TADA!!! Showdown with Dragon Queen!

Non-existent. She didn't show; apparently she was still on leave, and sent her subordinates to attend. Not that I have anything against them, but they aren't able to make any decisions or give definite answers. Which defeats the point of the meeting. Then we discovered they don't even know if the project has been given the go-ahead by their big big boss. Hooray.

And after all the trauma I went through preparing for the meeting. I stayed up to tag pages in Archive and lugged the ad mags to work in case she needed examples of campaign series. I especially picked out a grey and brown woollen attire (steady, serious about work) and red necklace (but with a dash of creativity) so Dragon Queen couldn't discriminate based on my appearance (which she is indeed capable of doing). I even dreamt of fielding her questions, like I was Jet Li being attacked by the Qin army's arrows in Hero.

CHEY!!!!

Labels: Concrete Jungle

6:29 pm Monday, October 29, 2007

End of the Road

"I foresee that my reputation at work will come to a premature terminus."

Okay. I am going to gripe about the 52 ZO cards again. Apparently the boss of Marketing a.k.a. rat-face, is laughing in the wings and waiting to see us fall flat on our faces attempting to complete this project. I stand corrected: see ME fall flat on MY face.

When our internal client, the Dragon Lady, broached this project Marketing didn't want to take it on cos the timeline was ridiculous and not feasible. On the other hand my boss jostled to take it on to 'prove that we can do it'. We? More like me. If the experts think it's lose-lose either way, why the hell are we taking it on?

We're having our first meeting with Dragon Lady tomorrow to trash things out and start work. I would like to be optimistic and positive, but somehow feel set up. It's as though boss is fielding me to take the risk, cos I am leaving anyway. So she can always say "Luckily she left" if I screw up. If I really succeed in completing the project, she can squeeze my creative juices dry and claim credit for it.

So smart.

Labels: Concrete Jungle

12:00 pm

What price friendship (at the workplace)?

Boss knows I am leaving. I had planned to tell her during our appraisal discussion as that is the official timing. Only colleagues whom I trusted knew about it, but apparently one offered the info to boss for whatever reason.

Luckily a little bird told me. And I am sorely disappointed with this perceived betrayal of our friendship. Got to be more careful who I trust. Thank you little bird.

The 2 of us go some time back and have a "you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours" agreement, helping each other out in projects. Hey wait a minute, on hindsight it might have been one-way.

When she screwed up on a very high profile project, I spotted a few errors in time for her to hide them. And I naively kept quiet for her sake so that boss would not know her errors.

Initially I was very pissed at her for telling. But then, looking from her position, I guess I can't blame her for protecting herself (even though I don't believe it was a live-or-die situation). But at least have the decency to forewarn me of what you were 'forced' to do. Now your smile seems fake and that's not very comforting for me either.

Labels: Concrete Jungle

9:14 am Friday, October 19, 2007

Another deja vu Dilbert

I have a project that began in Dec 06, a simple 20-page booklet. And up til today, the text is still being changed. It's a living mutating organism!

Labels: Boredom Relief, Concrete Jungle