I've been catching snippets of the Ch 8 drama serial Love Blossoms on weekday nights and am very bemused by the antics of the sisters-in-law played by Ivy Lee and Patricia Mok. The two exchange poisonous words and try to sabo each other to gain points with the mother/mother-in-law in the home.

But both of them have characteristics that irritate. Mok is an ugly but hiao spendthrift who thinks of herself as being high-class and has a holier-than-thou attitude. Lee is a die-hard gambler with a super-kiasu face, who resents her sister-in-law's presence in the house as Mok is always trying to sow discord between her mother and Lee, as well as invading into her marriage life and privacy.


This led me thinking... Do I do things which irritate my in-laws? Inversely, if they do things to irritate me I should be more tolerant if possible. One of my girlfriends was telling me how her husband's attention-seeking sister tried to outshine her on their wedding day. Even her husband couldn't stand it!

The dynamics between sisters-in-law and those between brothers-in-law are slightly different, although they both aim to please the parents-in-law. The guys will seldom be faulted for not 'doing their part', as though it is an extra, not an expected. Whereas the girls will be criticised as un-wifely or lacking in 家教, and their parents blamed for not training them well enough.


With such competition it's no wonder sisters-in-law are always at each other's throats. But my principle is not to comment too much on the other party in the presence of the parents, as that may be perceived as an attempt to sabo and undermine. Parents, if impartial, will be able to judge for themselves. If they are partial, then trying to say too much will just minus points from my own end.

Still it is difficult to keep my mouth shut on certain issues, so my husband and I do discuss with each other sometimes. But that's all. We don't try to interfere to do what we think should be done... although it can really irk us!

 

Labels: Cynic In The House