Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me~~~ Happy Birthday to me!

It's been a few days since my birthday, and I'm still in denial about my age :p I'm now literally in my thirTIES, but I still feel stuck in my uni years. Perhaps it's because I still feel as though I have a lot of unfulfilled dreams to chase haha. Quarter-life crisis (again)?

I've yet to find a job I'm willing to do for my whole life, or a field that gives me a balance of passion, money and humane working hours. I've narrowed down my interests to design or advertising. But working more than 12 hours a day for only $1k+? That doesn't make sense, nor is it a healthy lifestyle.

I wonder if it's because I've gone ahead of myself; getting a degree and working in jobs that should be paying me more than $3-4k if I hadn't taken my 3-year break for NAFA. I know what I can get, and hence can't persuade myself to settle for less as it's not rational.

Of course, I can always go back to the 9-5 office jobs and earn my high salary. But I can't bring myself to become a corporate robot. Why must one wear stuffy office wear, talk in 'professional' tones, and do things in a roundabout way just to fit into the existing system? I find that illogical and unnatural.

I want to dress like myself, to talk in my own way, and do things in the most direct and logical way. Am I being naive? Afterall I see so many friends who seem to be completely happy and contented running in the rat race and earning their huge salaries. If so many people are doing it, why can't I? Why shouldn't I?

I am still waiting to discover which my final path will be.

 

Labels: Designing My Future