3:24 pm Friday, November 17, 2006
Orange strings
Warning: Super long self-indulgent posting haha!The Chinese use 'red strings' to describe a couple who are fated to be together. The immortal matchmaker supposedly ties each end of a red string onto the two persons, and that keeps them together forever. I believe that something similar keeps friends together. There are some acquaintances who keep re-appearing in our lives, for no apparent reason. And there are people who we meet after a long period apart, but click back so perfectly as though no one ever left. Sometimes the best friends can meet once in a blue moon, but the friendship is stronger than with those we often hang out with.
Maybe it's the warmth of shared memories that keep the bond between two friends. Like family members, these are the only people who experienced the same specific incidences with us. Without them, it seems like those incidences never happened. Each time we see them, it validates our memories.Friends are also proof of good memories, and mark important milestones in our lives. Soaking in their company reassures us that life has more ups than downs, and that it's worthing persevering even when we are frustrated. It's tough trying to revive friendships that have grown distant. For many years I sent yearly Christmas cards to my Sec 4 class, but only one or two people responded. In the 4th year I got fed up and sent them cards, scolding them for not responded. And voila! Almost everyone responded and now we meet up for gatherings. Hee hee hee.Having been an MGS girl from Pri 1 - Sec 4, my Sec 4 classmates remind me of my entire childhood and puberty. Which is a huge chunk of 10 years. I remember every nook and cranny of the old MGS campus on Mount Sophia, and the time the class got punished and was made to stand in front of the whole school during flag-raising. I remember that our ex form teacher stood with us, while our current form teacher did not. Grrr.I miss the Christian hymns and choruses we sang (I had fun singing them although I didn't and don't believe in Christianity), the frequent fund-raising bazaars, and that I belonged to the red 'house' at sports meets. I remember my school bus driver Maggi Mee and his nephew Money Face, who stopped at Old Chang Kee on our way home every Friday to buy treats for us. I didn't have many friends in junior college or university. Coming from an all-girls school, I found guys immature, superficial and irritating. Couldn't really click with the girls too, as I was too busy studying to party with them. But I was glad to find a group of girlfriends in the NUS Buddhist Society, who were equally gungho and pro-active. We ruled the society and (we would like to think haha) made it better. I found and ended my first relationship while in it. Being a born-into Buddhist, it was also the time I explored my religion and decided that I am a Buddhist. More into its philosophy than 'supernatural' beliefs, but still, a Buddhist. Today we still meet up to attend Buddhist activities, or just to KTV and complain about the lack of equally gungho guys who can keep up with our pace. During the break before going to NUS, I had also plucked up the courage to sign up for a Xinyao songwriting camp. 11 years on, today the group of participants from XYY4 still meet up to talk cock and catch up. Many of us have found new callings or succumbed to life's practical demands. There are others who have pursued their passion in music and become professional (though part-time --- it's Singapore, dearie) songwriters, music producers and folk lounge singers. Now we are all too old to hold amateurish performances in community centres, force our friends and family buy tickets and sit through the concert, and not feel embarassed about it. But all of us are still held together by our passion for music --- and the knowledge that deep down inside we all share the same yearning to be able to express ourselves through our compositions.My 3 years in NAFA also yielded me a group of teenage friends, who have taught me a lot about being true to myself and enjoying life. Although I'm not sure how long we will continue to stay in touch after graduation. You know how teenagers are. At their age, everything changes very quickly as they search for new experiences after new experiences. I only hope that they remember this old auntie friend when they grow into their 20s and establish their career. That's the time when your friends become friends for life :)And thank god for MSN. Without it, I would have lost touch with Francis who is back home in Philippines, Jackie who is working as an architect in Sweden, the guys in national service who only have that little sliver of time late in the nights, and famous-designers-to-be who seem to be slaving away in front of their Macs 24/7.Friendship is like a spark that doesn't burn vigorously but smoulders slowly, til one day it reaches a bright flame that nothing can extinguish. It's up to us to put in the effort to make sure this flame doesn't die out.Labels: Nostalgic Nut
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Maybe it's the warmth of shared memories that keep the bond between two friends. Like family members, these are the only people who experienced the same specific incidences with us. Without them, it seems like those incidences never happened. Each time we see them, it validates our memories.