2:52 pm Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Fickle love
Two of my girlfriends have been going through very rough patches in their relationships.
The first is a plain but nice and sweet girl, who finally met her first love at her workplace. She gave it a try although he was quite different from her. A few years down the road, she discovered that he had been visiting prostitutes and had a weekend 'sex buddy' - a mutual friend of theirs. He isn't a dirty old uncle who's lonely and desperate, but an educated young man who should be able to think with his head, not his lower body. He dumped her for failing as a girlfriend as she 'did not want' to 'satisfy' him with pre-marital sex. Apparently all the 'software' like her love and concern were no match for the 'hardware' he sought.I thought such immature thinking belongs to teenagers. Even in Aunt Agony columns, the advice would be to dump this guy, cos obviously he stil hasn't grown up - if he loves her, he will wait. The guy twisted it around - if she loves him, she will give up her principles. How does one deal with such people, who will twist common sense to fit their intentions?My poor friend is still unable to walk out of his shadow, even considering giving in to get him back. Friends' logic fall on her deaf ears. The jerk still calls her up and meets her for lunch (as they used to), only to regale her with tales of how the other woman, now his girlfriend and soon-to-be wife, is willing to pander to his every request. It's scary. To think that among our society of supposed grown-ups, there are such people milling around, camouflaging their selfishness and immaturity with qualifications, office wear and pretty titles. As though all that helps to fill up their empty insides.
My other girlfriend is even worse off. She had a long-term boyfriend and depleted her savings for him. Eventually he committed suicide after being caught for a white-collar crime. It broke our hearts to see her crying buckets at his wake as his 'wife'. She actually had to use a towel to wipe her tears. So we were glad when one of his friends, who had liked her all along, started to woo her. He was her support and healed her. They got married and stayed with his family, though she had misgivings about it. But nevermind, she thought, she should not stop her husband from being a filial son. They now have a new-born girl, and we were so happy for her.But the proverbial mother-in-law from hell started her black magic, and drove such a wedge between the couple that the once sweet and loving hubby did a 180 degree turn. From being a critic of his own mother, he started to agree with her nonsense. He forbid my friend's parents to come see the baby, and she was not allowed to bring the baby home to her parents' place. Common sense will tell you that that's unreasonable.Of course she was trapped and unhappy, and quarrels arose. Now her husband wants to divorce her based on this 'unhappiness'. He does not even realise or accept that he is to blame, for being unreasonable and not standing by his wife.Some men really don't get it :(Labels: Cynic In The House
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The first is a plain but nice and sweet girl, who finally met her first love at her workplace. She gave it a try although he was quite different from her. A few years down the road, she discovered that he had been visiting prostitutes and had a weekend 'sex buddy' - a mutual friend of theirs. 
